Narrowboat Life

You wanted a slower pace of life. You hadn't realised most of it would be spent waiting for the water tank to fill.

From the towpath, a narrowboat looks like the answer to everything: peaceful mornings, ducks at the window and the freedom to disappear into the British countryside.

From inside, someone is asking how much electricity the toaster uses, your damp trousers are obstructing the kitchen, and the toilet has become a matter requiring a joint decision.

Welcome aboard.

Narrowboat Life is an affectionate, gloriously sarcastic look at the peculiar business of making life considerably more complicated in pursuit of a quiet one.

From the innocent boat viewing that somehow acquires a solicitor's level of seriousness to your first public attempt at reversing, Johnathan Martin explores a world where:

• The perfect mooring is always just beyond the perfectly adequate one you passed forty minutes ago.
• A stranger can ask about your toilet before learning your name, and you will consider this excellent conversation.
• Finding a clean jumper involves moving three cushions, a toolbox and the person you married.
• Your partner's hand signals become increasingly vigorous without becoming any more informative.
• An unfamiliar engine noise can destroy a lovely afternoon before anything has actually broken.

And somewhere between the muddy ropes, the battery readings and the expedition to retrieve the car, something rather inconvenient happens.

You fall completely in love with it.

Written with dry British wit and considerable affection for canal life, this is a book for narrowboat owners, liveaboards, holiday boaters and anyone whose partner has recently said, "Just imagine waking up here."

An ideal gift for the boater who has everything-provided they can find somewhere to put it.

Come aboard. Mind your head. We'll discuss the toilet once you've had your tea.